I’m Tired, Boss

tenorLiterally, when people ask how I’m doing my usually answer is fine or alright. When I really want to say I don’t fucking know. I just feel like I’m stuck in this point of my life. I’m working just to work because you do have to pay bills, but it’s not satisfying. Plus, I still don’t know my passion or what I want to do for my career or the rest of my life so I’m just working until I figure it out. I try not to complain too much to people or myself because there aren’t many people working in the field they pursued in college. Also, not everyone has a job or career so I can’t complain too much. But, still I’m just in a “I don’t know” space. I don’t know what else to call it or how to express it. I just don’t know.

tenor (1)I don’t have the same experience as some of my peers as to working while in school. My first job was my senior year in college working in the dean’s office. Then my official first job was my internship during my last year in undergrad and they offered to add me on as full-time. My friends used to call me Tommy because I had no job, but I always had money. Honestly, I was grateful to have parents that gave me an “allowance.” Plus, my mom said she didn’t want me to have a job while in school and one of my professors said, “once you start working, you will never stop working.” For some reason that stuck with me and it wasn’t until I started working as an accountant where I finally understood what my professor meant by that saying. Shout out to Professor Wiley also known as Marcus Wiley and a Texas Southern University alumni.


As an accountant with two degrees, I still feel like I haven’t not figured out what I want to do with my life and/or career. I know people says you’re not the only one that think about this, but I don’t care I’m talking about me. Also, maybe because I feel like people think I have it all figured out when I really don’t, but personally I do feel like I should have it figured out. Then again, a lot of the people or celebrities we look up to didn’t start their careers until they were 30 or older. And I’m not even 30 yet.

Hope you like my rant about work, not feeling accomplished yet, and just being a 20-something who is still trying to figure out life. Also, check out my podcast, Smell The Roses with AP, where I talk about things like this or whatever is on my mind at that time.

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