I’m Back Yall!

Dear Yall,

Tonight/ Today was a great and inspiring day. I was on my second day of apartment hunting and let’s just say it’s been a minute since I did this. I know the leasing agent was looking at me crazy when I asked do you apply online. Like duh everything is online now even apartment applications. But overall, it’s been good, and I feel rejuvenated to get my own place again. I felt like a newbie but pro at the same time with the apartment shopping. Let’s just say I have at least two contenders that I would sign today. But I’m also thinking of taking my time because I at least can move in little by little. Check out the places at night to get a feel, you know.

Then I took a stop in a parking lot to see where my next apartment was and noticed the security guard of the lot on the ground. I thought he was fixing his tire on the security car, but he was actually praying. It took me a moment to look at his surroundings to nice his shoes were off, and he was facing East. It was a beautiful sight to see. A Black man praying to Allah and showing the honor he has for his beliefs.

It also made me question my honor and dedication to my prayers. I know what needs to be done but end up forgetting or not doing it at all. Now I’m going to set some more alarms lol, to remind myself to pray. My ADHD mind goes all over the place, so my alarms helps me a lot to stay focus and remember.

To end my night, I’m picking up some Uber Eats and the cashier start talking to me since I had to wait on the food. Y’all, I feel like we talked for a good 15 minutes. Maybe exaggerating but maybe not. That’s how crazy this interaction was tonight. So, dude just started telling me about his people who are suicidal and how he felt bad for them. You could tell it was also a lot for him.

This is understandable because people want to help so bad but sometimes it’s nothing you can do. Just be there or ask the person what they need from you. I felt really bad for the guy because I could tell he just needed to vent. He had other close people he lost to suicide, so he was starting to see those same signs in his other friend. He said he needed that release and laugh. Oh yeah, he did tell me a funny story, that I don’t think I should repeat lol. But dude was definitely an OG.

This whole time I’m the only one in the drive thru, the cook just cooking the food while he talk, and I’m just making sure it wasn’t a set up. But I felt it was supposed to happen as I do everything. It felt really good to help someone with their mental well-being, and even telling them what I felt their energy was projecting at that time. I had to let him know that he is protected and has some spiritual gifts. I feel like he is the key for his people to heal.

I just remembered how the conversation started, he asked did I know another way to go to sleep besides meds. I lit up and started naming different herbs and tea to use. Omg like literally using my knowledge and gifts to help others. My go to saying is Idk my purpose but I know I’m here to help people. Well, my updated saying now is I know my purpose is here to help heal people internally and externally with my magic hands.

Well, it feels really good to be writing again and wanting to hear from you guys as well. Below is some information to help anyone dealing with mental health issues, not feeling like themselves, or just needing someone to talk to when they can’t talk to their peers. I hope this helps someone. Say I love you to your family and friends because we never know what anyone is truly going through. Stay blessed, create your own happiness and love on yourself. Until next time….

  • Mental Health Emergency Hotline: You can connect with a trained counselor by calling, chatting, or texting 988
  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
  • Crisis Text Line: Text TALK to 741741 for 24/7, anonymous, and free counseling
  • Self-Harm Hotline: 1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)
  • For all other hotlines, used this link Crisis Hotlines


AP Rose


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